Well…it’s been a while. I’m exhausted. Shocking huh? I took a bit of a break from the blog for a while, but I am attempting to return. Every time I would have a few minutes to sit and write, I would always weigh my options: blog or sleep? Sleep won every single time.

We are beginning to settle into a bit of a routine. We are figuring out this parenting stuff a little. It hasn’t been the easiest road for me, I’ve been sick a lot and dealing with a number of things. Throw in the hormones and lack of sleep and I’m a mess at times. Luckily I have an amazing husband who picks up the slack for me when I reach my breaking point.

Having a new baby is not really what I expected. Some of the things I expected, but there is really no way to prepare yourself for this. I really don’t sleep, she really does cry a lot and poop a LOT. It’s the most exhausting experience of my life.

But it’s also the most rewarding.

I love being a mom. I adore this little girl. I can stare at her for hours and I’m still in shock that she came out of me (mostly shocked by that because she’s so big!) I see so much of me in her already and I hope and pray that’s a good thing!

I can’t thank you enough for all your prayers and support lately. It’s very difficult doing this with no family around. But the love and support we feel helps us through each day. Yes, it’s hard now and we are still figuring things out.

But each day is better than before… and we will sleep when she’s 30.

I’m a good sleeper.  Ok… a GREAT sleeper.  I have slept through my neighbor’s house catching on fire and firetrucks. I’ve slept through MANY thunderstorms (in Oklahoma of course, California doesn’t know what those things are). My dog can jump all over me and nothing. I’m out. My hubby enjoys this because a lot of the time I will chat with him and never realize it happened.

I had worried a bit that I wouldn’t hear my babies cry in the middle of the night, and would be a bad mother because I’m such a hard sleeper. Everyone tells me my sleeping habits will quickly change once I’m a mommy, and I do hope this is the case.

However, this child is already preparing me.  As I lay here awake at 3am because it’s “playtime”, I can’t help but cherish these moments.  Yes, I will be tired all day and a little annoyed that I didn’t get my 8 hours straight. But, these last few weeks I get to rest. Yes, I’m very uncomfortable, finding it hard to sleep and our little kickboxer is the most active baby of all time.  Yes, I hate being pregnant and can’t wait to be done.  BUT…this is the last few weeks of me. Just me. I have no little ones crying, having bad dreams or needing mommy in the middle of the night yet.  I just lay here and feel her roll and kick. What a blessing that is.

Keep kicking baby girl.  Mommy will sleep when you’re all grown up.