you can't always get what you want

If I've learned anything about being a mom, it's that you can't always get what you want.  It's not about you anymore, and everything you do is for this tiny little person.  But I've also learned to not set expectations.  This is where I failed myself.  I went through {an extremely rough} pregnancy expecting it to all end once the baby arrived.  But then there was healing from a c-section, losing weigh, a whole new dose of hormones...and breastfeeding. Yikes.

I expected this to be easy.  I actually remember saying that it would come easily and be no problem.  No one really tells you that it might not go as perfectly as planned.  The first few days went great and I thought it was going to be great for us...then it all exploded.  Munchkin destroyed me.  I got two rounds of mastitis, and even ended up in the emergency room.  A lingering infection for 4 months that no doctors could explain.  We finally got to the point that it was too much torture, and my sanity was hanging by a thread.

Although it was one of the most difficult things I've ever done, I don't regret it for a second.  My baby got a great start.  It literally broke my heart to put her on formula, but I know it's the best thing for both of us.  I'm thankful that I did everything I possibly could to make it work, even though it didn't work out for us.

No you can't always get what you want...but if you try sometimes, you just might find, you get what you need.  Munchkin will always get what she needs, even if it's not what I want.