i'm terrified of small groups

Ok...maybe not terrified.  But honestly, they are difficult for me.  Most churches have moved away from Sunday School, and focus more on Small Groups/Life Groups/Community Groups...whatever you may call them.  I think this is awesome.  I truly believe that it is so important to have people you can pour into and vice-versa.  Hear me out...I think they are extremely important. However, I'm terrified of them. I just simply don't like them.

Oh....and why do all of our church graphics for small groups have to have people holding hands?? What group of people actually sits in a circle and holds hands?

Anyway...

Being a pastor & pastor's wife, as hubby and I are, we draw a lot of "attention" from people who attend the churches we work for. Sometimes good attention and sometimes bad.  But there is something about the pastor that people are drawn to.  And they think the pastor's wife is absolutely holy & perfect.  Oh my...if only they knew.

All that to say, it's difficult for me to be vulnerable.  It's hard to open up. It takes a lot of trust and many things for us to feel completely comfortable to talk about deep spiritual things going on with us, especially to people who look up to us so much.

We have some amazing friendships that we sink into so comfortably and can openly share anything. Most are either fellow pastors & wives, or are friends/family we have known for a long long time.  I'm so thankful God has placed those people in our lives. I really think we'd be lost without them.

How do you allow yourself to open up and be vulnerable to a new group of people?

If you are a pastor's wife, what's the best way for you to find "community" and relationships and actually be able to let your guard down?